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JavierModeratorFears take longer to disappear, but we can also get rid of those. Celebrating every time we avoid a bad incident, every time we use a Crutch, expanding little by little our comfort zones…
Mind training, auto-suggestions are extemely important here. Once you become a PWSS, Gábor, I recommend you to read and do the online course of “Speech Anxiety to Public Speaking”. It’s like the next step to the Stuttering bookJavierModeratorI used to stutter a lot more with strangers. As a PWS I never had a stutter-free zone that wasn’t being alone.
Now, I sometimes have more fears in certain situations, and they make me feel more uncomfortable, so I have to concentrate more on using the Crutches, and on exaggerating them. I think exaggeration is key.
But I know that these fears will disappear. They are actually getting weaker and weaker, and less and less frequent each day.JavierModeratorThat’s a good one, Cindy! We tend to speak faster when we’re under pressure, and that makes it even worse.
JavierModeratorCrutch 11 is extremely useful. I particularly like C-4 and C-10 (including holding the tone). Crutch 9 is also very helpful. I guess it depends on the situation…
JavierModeratorI think I get your point, Gábor. There might be people who can be successful in their job, and live a happy life, but I’m completely sure that they could be much happier if they didn’t stutter. Nobody likes to stutter. It’s really uncomfortable, even humiliating. So nobody likes that, not even the people surrounding us. I can say that having stopped stuterring has not only turned me into a happier person, my family are also happier. They have suffered stuttering, indirectly.
JavierModeratorI fully agree with both of you. Unfortunately, there are plenty of people who confuse causes with consecuences when it comes to stuttering, even in the medical community…
JavierModeratorExactly! Before I found Lee’s book, I thought I would be stuttering all my life, but that’s because I didn’t know that I could actually find a way to become a PWSS. So I had to accept the situation, although I didn’t like it at all. Once I found Lee’s book, I knew that I could become a PWSS, just like many others did, and so I did.
JavierModeratorYou will get there, Gábor! Many people have achieved this, so you can also do it. People usually stop stuttering in a couple of months. Some take longer, some others do it in a month or so. I stopped stuttering in around 8 months. But some of the people I’ve coached have done it in 5 weeks. But the fears take longer to disappear, but they also disappear.
JavierModeratorI don’t see the problem with the word either…. As you know, I became a PWSS more than one year ago, and I consider myself cured. There are still things I want to improve, true, as we will never be perfect. Nobody ever will.
But here’s some proof of that I’m cured. 10 minutes ago I was driving home, and a couple, 20 meters away who were taking the dogs for a walk, said to me, “hello Javier!”. At first I couldn’t recognise who they were, it was dark, but a few seconds later I did: some friends of my family, and I haven’t seen them in ages, although they were aware of the improvements on my speech. They were amazed when they heard me speak. So yes, I am cured. I had a speech impediment. Now I don’t.JavierModeratorThat’s great! It means that the mind training is working! As Leah said before, you should feel good, you should congratulate yourself every time you use the Crutches successfully. Thanks to the Crutches you have dodged a block/stutter, and most likely, in the past you would have forced that word and therefore appeared speech disabled. But not this time. This is the reason why we shouldn’t feel bad or ashamed whenever we use the Crutches. So smile every time you use them.
As you know, some of the Crutches can even improve your speech, and make you a great speaker. Crutch 11 is an example.JavierModeratortry combining Crutch 1 and Crutch 4 at the same time. Combining Crutches usually works even better. About your suggestion, I’ll speak about this to WSSA. Thanks for the suggestion again!
October 2, 2020 at 4:59 pm in reply to: The fallacy of believing that we stutter worse on certain letters. #27846JavierModeratorI agree. If we stutter more on particular letters it is because we consciously or subconsciously fear those letters, and therefore we stutter on those. It is the same as why we stutter more when saying our name compared to any other name.
October 2, 2020 at 10:12 am in reply to: Should you finish a PWS sentence when they are stuttering? #27843JavierModeratorI’ve heard a lot of people, including SLP, advising the opposite, to let the stutterer struggle with the word until they say it.
The way I see it, as long as the person who’s helping you say that word does it to help us, I’m fine with that. Fortunately, thank’s to the Lovett method, we won’t be needing this help for much longer 🙂
JavierModeratorIt might work. But don’t forget to visualize yourself speaking fuently, feeling relaxed and confident, and enjoying yourself. Visualization is key both in auto-suggestions and self-hypnosis.
JavierModeratorYou’re right Gábor. And it is great to see that you’ve gotten rid of the frustration. There’s no need to have those feelings, they don’t do us any good. You can stop stuttering, just like many others have done. Keep working on it.
Have you attended to any of our weekly meetings, the speech club, on Saturdays?: https://worldstopstuttering.org/speech-club/
You will meet with PWS and PWSS, and you can hear their stories, talk to them. You can attend as a listener if you don’t want to talk. It’s very motivational, and fun. -
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